Part of my job is going through the customer messages to take care of the little things. Sometimes it's an address change, or a request for a specific color. I end up seeing all the customer messages, even though some of them are left for the more knowledgeable A or C (the bosses) to deal with. And some people over-share...
Monday, April 30, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
The Naughty List
I packed my first butt plug today.
That deserves it's own paragraph. It was solid steel with a jewel in the... end that sticks out? Is there a term for this I'll eventually pick up?
Packing orders to ship with their labels feels an awful lot like being a dirty Santa. "Here's your anal lube, Steven. Use it wisely!" I think to myself as I seal another package. "I hope you enjoy these nipple clamps, Janet!"
Except everyone getting our toys is most definitely on the naughty list.
That deserves it's own paragraph. It was solid steel with a jewel in the... end that sticks out? Is there a term for this I'll eventually pick up?
Packing orders to ship with their labels feels an awful lot like being a dirty Santa. "Here's your anal lube, Steven. Use it wisely!" I think to myself as I seal another package. "I hope you enjoy these nipple clamps, Janet!"
Except everyone getting our toys is most definitely on the naughty list.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Shipping Dongs
It's my first Monday. I've been told they are the craziest, since we've got all the orders since Friday night to pull, pack, and ship. The warehouse is still in the larval stages of being completed, but we're going to do what we can. Today, I'm learning to pack.
Our warehouse manager (M) gives me a quick rundown of the different bags and boxes, the different shipping labels, and other tips he can think of. The rest will just have to be learned as we go. He then disappears for a few minutes and comes back with a supply of vibrators and dongs to be packaged. Have you ever shoved an 8.5" floppy wang into a USPS priority flat rate envelope? I have.
The whole day is a blur of dildos in various sizes and colors, some with hilarious Engrish on the packaging ("stimulation terminator!"). I start seeing some of the other items we carry: pocket pussies and hand-held masturbators, bondage cuffs, cock rings. Some of the things that land on the shipping table, I can't even imagine what they're used for. I have a feeling I'll know sooner, rather than later.
Our warehouse manager (M) gives me a quick rundown of the different bags and boxes, the different shipping labels, and other tips he can think of. The rest will just have to be learned as we go. He then disappears for a few minutes and comes back with a supply of vibrators and dongs to be packaged. Have you ever shoved an 8.5" floppy wang into a USPS priority flat rate envelope? I have.
The whole day is a blur of dildos in various sizes and colors, some with hilarious Engrish on the packaging ("stimulation terminator!"). I start seeing some of the other items we carry: pocket pussies and hand-held masturbators, bondage cuffs, cock rings. Some of the things that land on the shipping table, I can't even imagine what they're used for. I have a feeling I'll know sooner, rather than later.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
The New Warehouse
Day 1 on the job, first day at the new warehouse. Everything is still in boxes labeled innocuously, like ir6001 or co126. Only one box isn't closed on top, and it's brimming with huge green vibrators with a bright yellow pineapple stuck on the base. Oh, lord.
Last weekend I moved back to the town where I grew up, from the town where I went to college. This weekend I started work for my roommate's sister and her husband. Selling dongs on the internet.
Welcome to The Dong Diaries.
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Friday and Saturday has been spent by other muscle moving boxes of product, disassembled shelves, and other such things into the new warehouse. It's massive and a bit twisty, leading from room to room. This is my first time meeting my new bosses and the other various helpers on this moving project, but I jump right in to help.
It's a sweaty, un-airconditioned day building shelves and getting eaten alive by mosquitoes. Near the end of the day, we manage to have nearly all the shelves together and start stocking. Kind of. It's an internet business, you see, so nothing ships out on the weekend but that doesn't mean orders aren't coming in. Tomorrow is Monday, and we've got to be ready to pack and ship. People need their sex toys!
The last few hours of an extremely long day are spent building penis pump kits using individual bulk pieces (tubing, cylinders, etc). I begin to wonder, for who knows what time today, what I have gotten myself into.
Last weekend I moved back to the town where I grew up, from the town where I went to college. This weekend I started work for my roommate's sister and her husband. Selling dongs on the internet.
------
Friday and Saturday has been spent by other muscle moving boxes of product, disassembled shelves, and other such things into the new warehouse. It's massive and a bit twisty, leading from room to room. This is my first time meeting my new bosses and the other various helpers on this moving project, but I jump right in to help.
It's a sweaty, un-airconditioned day building shelves and getting eaten alive by mosquitoes. Near the end of the day, we manage to have nearly all the shelves together and start stocking. Kind of. It's an internet business, you see, so nothing ships out on the weekend but that doesn't mean orders aren't coming in. Tomorrow is Monday, and we've got to be ready to pack and ship. People need their sex toys!
The last few hours of an extremely long day are spent building penis pump kits using individual bulk pieces (tubing, cylinders, etc). I begin to wonder, for who knows what time today, what I have gotten myself into.
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